No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
