Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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