okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
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