Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
