Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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