yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Randomize
