There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
