So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Randomize
