ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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