I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Randomize
