No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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