y did u give ur computer a hand job?
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
