8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
