dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
She announced her abortion via fbk
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I think your dad took our porno
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Randomize
