Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Randomize
