and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
