There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
