He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
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