We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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