11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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