their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Randomize
