We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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