Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
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he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
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I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.