Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
your room smells of hookers.
And success
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
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