it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
