New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
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