if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
We're not piercing ourselves today.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
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