You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Randomize
