His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.