Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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