i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Everyone says I win the strip club
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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