How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
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