doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
