Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
