I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
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