For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
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I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
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And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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