Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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