Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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