We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize