Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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