i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize
