I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
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