chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
no you cant smoke seaweed
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
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