He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
