You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Randomize
