piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
