grandma shit on top of the toilet
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
