hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
