If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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