**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
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