the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize