Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
